Thursday, May 26, 2005

The Green Fairy

Danger Bob and I were drinking coffee yesterday and he told me a story about this crazy guy they had to subdue last month so the paramedics could take him to the hospital. When Bob showed up the guy was fighting with the paramedics. Bob said they pretty well had to beat him down to get him strapped into the gurney. Bob likes using the baton, but was a little pissed about ripping his uniform pants in the struggle. Apparently the guy was screaming and totally incoherent. Not a real big guy, but solid.

The crazy guy's name turns out to be Robert and his roommate was the one who called the paramedics because Robert wasn't responsive, just staring out into space. After the paramedics left with Robert, Robert's sister Juanita showed up at the apartment. The roommate called her and Bob was nice enough to give her a ride down to the hospital. Juanita was apparently gorgeous and she really hit it off with Bob. They've been seeing each other some ever since. I'm still not sure if the police department approves of Bob's methods of meeting women, but I'll let him worry about that.

Anyway, crazy guy (Robert) has pretty much recovered now, but when he showed up at the emergency room that night the doctors thought he was a suicide because there was so much poison in his system. They pumped his stomach and hooked him up to a dialysis machine. They think the dialysis is what saved his life.

The story the roommate told the doctors was that he and Robert had been drinking absinthe the night before and smoking lots of marijuana. Robert swears up and down to this sister that all he'd had that night was absinthe and marijuana, nothing else. I don't know whether to believe him or not, but it's certainly made me think twice about ever trying any concoction with wormwood in it.

The doctors think that the marijuana might have prevented his body from breaking the wormwood down and the longer it stays in the body the more toxic it becomes.

I haven't met Juanita or Robert personally, so this is all secondhand from Bob, but I thought I would pass this cautionary tale along. I've told this story to several people now and they tell me they tried absinthe and didn't have any problems, but I haven't talked to anyone yet who was smoking weed and drinking absinthe.

I guess Robert's roommate had some absinthe and some weed, but he didn't have as much of either as Robert did. I found this information about wormwood, which may be of interest. Turns out wormwood makes a good poultice and is a natural insect repellant.

[This page was edited on May 29, 2005 by Safety Neal]

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